NO-vember: A month of saying No

Have you noticed how easy it is to say YES when every part of you actually wants to say no?

Maybe your shoulders tighten, your stomach knots, or your heart feels heavy but you nod anyway. I see it all the time with my clients, and honestly, I’ve been there too. Saying yes can feel safer than disappointing someone. It can feel easier than facing the awkwardness, the guilt, the fear.

But here’s the truth I want to share with you: saying yes when your body says no slowly erodes your energy, your joy, and your connection to yourself. That’s why this November, I’m inviting you to join me in NO-vember… a month to listen to your body, reclaim your voice, and practice saying no without guilt, shame, or fear.

The Subtle Trap of People-Pleasing

We live in a world that rewards “yes.” We get praised for helping, for showing up, for doing more. And yet, underneath those yeses, there’s often fear or guilt whispering: you should, you must, you can’t let them down.

People-pleasing is sneaky. It can feel like love, but it often comes at a cost: drained energy, resentment bubbling under the surface, and a creeping disconnection from your own needs.

Over the years, I’ve watched so many women, including myself, override that inner NO too many times. And the emotional toll? It’s real. Guilt punches your stomach. Regret whispers in your ear. Fear convinces you that you’re selfish for even thinking of yourself.

And yet, our bodies know the truth long before our minds catch up. Our body KNOWS we are in survival brain when we people please.

Your Body is Talking, Are You Listening?

That tight jaw, restless mind, heaviness in your chest, it’s your body sending signals. Every time you ignore it, you teach yourself that your needs don’t matter. But when you start listening, really pausing and tuning in, everything shifts.

You start noticing the difference between a “yes” from obligation and a “yes” from alignment. You feel the subtle difference between a “no” that drains your energy and a “no” that restores it. And you begin to trust yourself again, not just in big decisions, but in all the little moments of life.

Why Saying No is Actually Loving

I want to be really clear: saying no isn’t about being harsh or unkind. It’s about protection. It’s about respect. It’s about showing yourself the same care you give so freely to others.

Some of my NO-vember moments are small: turning off my phone for a few hours, skipping an event because my body needed stillness, saying no to a client session when my energy wasn’t fully present. But each one feels huge because each one strengthens my self-trust and reminds me that I matter.

And here’s the magic: when you honour your boundaries, the right energy flows back to you. You have more clarity, more focus, more joy. The relationships around you become richer, not because you give more, but because you give authentically.

Your 5-Step NO-vember Action Plan

Here’s a simple way to start reclaiming your energy this month:

1. Pause Before You Say Yes
Before agreeing, take a breath. Feel into your body. Even a two-second pause can help you notice what you really want.

2. Listen to Your Body
Notice tension, heaviness, or discomfort. Your body is often the first to know when something isn’t right. Ask yourself do I feel safe with this?

3. Give Yourself Permission
You don’t need to explain, justify, or apologise for saying no. Your energy matters and your body deserves to be heard.

4. Start Small
Begin with little no’s: skipping a social event, saying no to an extra task at work, or turning your phone off for some quiet. Celebrate each one - they’re victories for your self-respect.

5. Reflect and Share
Notice how it feels when you say no. Record your wins, feelings, or discoveries. Sharing with others can create accountability, support, and encouragement. Add your findings and actions to our chat about #NOvember

What Happens When You Start Saying No

Here’s what I’ve noticed, both in my clients and in my own life:

• The weight of obligation starts to lift.

• Small joys feel bigger: a sunrise walk, a cup of tea, a moment of stillness.

• You begin to show up from a place of love, not fear or obligation.

• You reconnect with your energy, your intuition, your heart.

Saying no can feel scary at first. You might worry about disappointment, conflict, or backlash. And sometimes, yes, people will be disappointed. But their feelings are their responsibility not yours. Your responsibility is to yourself, your energy, and your well-being.

Making NO-vember a Community Practice

This is also about connection. I want you to share your wins, your awkward moments, your little breakthroughs. When we see other honouring themselves, it gives us permission to do the same. That’s the energy of NO-vember: a wave of women collectively remembering that their energy, their bodies, and their voices matter and can be put first.

Imagine if every woman reading this chose one true NO this week. One NO that aligns with her body, heart, and soul. That ripple spreads to your family, your friends, your work, your community. Saying NO becomes contagious, and suddenly self-respect is the norm instead of the exception.

Your Invitation

This month let’s try something radical:

• Notice, pause, and choose for yourself.

• Reclaim your energy, your voice, and your joy.

• Turn those tiny inner whispers of no into bold declarations of yes

• Yes to rest, yes to self-respect, yes to the life you actually want to live.

I’ll be here with you, sharing stories, celebrating wins, and holding space for the stumbles both in Create Heart (my Facebook group) and at Zode Kinesiology’s socials.

NO-vember isn’t about defiance, it’s about coming home to yourself. So, let’s do this together. What’s one NO you’re choosing this week? And what’s your yes behind it - that quiet, nourishing, life-giving yes you’ve been craving?

Here’s to NO-vember (#November) where saying no becomes the most loving yes of all.

From my Heart to Yours

Zoe x